But I say, let them eat chicken!
These breaded pieces of poultry are so much more than they’re made out to be.
But, what constitutes a well-made chicken tender?
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
To answer that, you must first understand what a chicken tender even is, anyway.
Strips and fingers, on the other hand, can come from any part of the chicken breast.
I wasn’t asking for much from these poultry products.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
My top criteria was for the shape to be long and chunky.
And, above all else, the chicken had to resemble real, juicy chicken.
But, a nugget-like consistency would just not do.
Trader Joe’s
I cooked all the chicken in a conventional oven to even the playing field.
Trader Joe’s Chickenless Crispy Tenders
I’ll admitthese chickenless tendersare a bit of a wildcard.
And, also the cheapest at just $3.79.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
Real oat flecks can also be seen stuck to the outside of each piece.
The texture is off.
And, more importantly, the taste is way off.
Caulipower
And, for anyone else, I would recommend avoiding this bad egg, altogether.
And yes, they are gluten-free thanks to cauliflower and rice flour coating.
The Look: A tad pitiful, carcass-like, and not at all like a traditional tender.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
The thickness is just not there and the apparent dryness does not make them look very enticing.
I even squirted a little extra ketchup on my plate before digging in just in preparation.
But, that all seems to fizzle away when it comes to the taste.
Real Good Foods/Facebook
Instead, they give off a synthetic-key in flavor and the meat reminds me more of turkey than chicken.
Maybe that’s just the price you pay for such a low-calorie, low-fat choice.
That’s the company’s whole shtick and itsLightly Breaded Chicken Stripsfollow suit.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
These cost me $9.99.
The Look:The darkest piece of chicken I have ever laid my eyes on.
In terms of size, they are right around the middle of the pack.
Beyond Meat
The Taste:Smokey and unexpected.
The meat itself is pretty standard, but on the dryer side.
Overall, I think the surprise of the flavorings left a bad taste in my mouth.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
But, I can see how these protein bombs could be appealing to some.
And, I’ve always been pleasantly surprised at how closely they do resemble real meat.
However, this was my first introduction to Beyond Chicken.
Perdue
The Look:Medium-sized but the shape still reads more like a chicken nugget.
The coating has some nice coloring, albeit a bit fragile and scanty overall.
The meat is questionable and I’m not sure it could pass for real chicken.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
Even its close-up shot on the bag makes it look just a little bit sketchy.
What gives it away is the denseness and the lack of moisture that real meat offers.
Maybe it’s just proof that eight minutes really isn’t enough time in the oven?
Perdue Farms
One which caught my eye was organic raisin juice.
The Perdue tenders are also gluten-free.
A 22-ounce box cost me $10.49.
Megan Hagement for Eat This, Not That!
The Look:Pretty skinny.
The coloring is nice and turned the teensiest bit brown in the oven.
Its ingredient list is also eerily similar to Perdue’s own brand, minus the organic labels.
Target
(Yummy, it turns out, is an affiliate of Perdue Farms.)
A 22-ounce box cost me $5.99.
The Look:Very similar to the Perdue tenders.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
The panko breading on these does give them a little extra crisp and oomph, though.
But, further inspection of its ingredients list prompted me to throw them in my cart anyway.
The Look:Chunkythe bulkiest of any thus farand traditional.
Applegate Farms
Finally a presentation to be proud of and one I could easily see being served at a restaurant!
The Taste:Juicy, but not enough crunch.
I was really rooting for this one since everything on paperor rather, on my platewas up to snuff.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
The chicken, both real and bold, delivers.
Plus, raisin juice concentrate once again made an appearance.
The Look:Almost like a chicken wing with very fair skin.
Tyson
Breading is dense and peppered, but no other spices give themselves away.
The Taste:Very nicely executed.
But, this moist chicken fused with a light garlicky breading was certainly strutting its stuff.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
And, spoiler alert, after a quick home-experiment, I proved this hypothesis to be true.
Tyson Crispy Chicken Strips
Tyson is no spring chicken in the poultry game.
The packaging also uses the word “fritters” to describe them.
Megan Hageman for Eat This, Not That!
The Look:Colossal, but also the quintessential chicken tender.
There’s additionally something comforting and nostalgic about the breadinglike homestyle cooking.
The chicken breast was tender and savory.
They match Good & Gather’s in priceat $7.99for just a morsel more of chicken.
And, they’re comparable to Tyson’s cost per pound, as well.
The Look:Nothing like the bag would suggest.
On the packaging, these tenderloins look flat and almost triangular-shaped.
This time, however, not an inch of chicken went uncovered.
The Taste:Toothsome perfection.
The exterior crust develops a nice snap and adds depth rather than overpowering the meat, as well.
If you’re looking for a truly top-notch tender, Trader Joe’s is the place to go.
